A couple of weeks ago the three of us were outside with Luki playing catch (which, with a 15 month old is a lot more like fetch: we throw him the ball, he runs after it, and then brings it back to us over and over. He’s such a good boy! Yes he is!) when our neighbor stopped by to chit chat. And, while Ton Ton was engrossed in training our offspring for what he hopes will be a future in the MLB, the man who lives next door causally mentioned to me that he and his parents were going to be traveling to India for a month. And did I know they had a pet turtle? No? Well, they do, and its name is Chengu. And when he called the airline to ask if Chengu could travel across the world with them, he was told that reptiles aren’t allowed to fly. And he had no idea what he was going to do with poor, little Chengu, his companion for the last eight years.

And then he mentioned that the purpose of the whole trip is for him to find a wife. And the thought of a turtle ruining his chances of eternal bliss warmed my cold as stone, animal hating heart, so, without even consulting my husband, I found myself saying “of course we’ll take care of Chengu! I’m sure Luki will love to have a pet around.”

And that is how we became pet owners for a month.

It hasn’t been bad at all. And Luki really does love that damn turtle. Every morning and evening he waves hello and good night to little Chengu and he even kisses the glass of the aquarium where he lives. This kid and his crazy, incomprehensible love for non-human creatures. I just hope I don’t end up with dogs instead of grandchildren.

Anyway.

The other day I was on Skype talking to my mom and noticed that Luki was chewing on something. It was neither snack nor dinner time so I asked Ton Ton to please check what was in our child’s mouth. Big E heard me and started on one of her diatribes about how we need to pay more attention to the baby! one day he is going to choke on something dangerous! does she need to get on a plane back here to put order in our house? blah, blah, blah.

Meanwhile, Ton Ton looked in Luki’s mouth and, after realizing that it was jut a cracker our son had picked up off the floor, he said loudly so that Big E would hear:

“I’M NOT REALLY SURE WHAT’S IN THERE. BUT IT KIND OF LOOKS LIKE CHENGU’S FOOD!”

I could have logged off Skype and would have still been able to hear my mother’s horrified screams.

Oh, Chengu… where have you been all my life?