Dear Luki,

In two days you will turn one year old. One year old! Typing that just now made me a little dizzy. Time is spinning way too fast and I can’t seem to keep my balance.

Even though you will not remember it or even realize that it’s happening, we are throwing you a birthday party on Saturday. There’s going to be tasty food, and a cake, and lovely decorations, and I know everyone is going to have a wonderful time… but I also know that it will be one of those moments in which I will miss your grandpa more than ever. It seems terribly unfair that he didn’t get to go to a single one of your birthday parties.

But today, Luki, I want you to know that, although you only knew him for five short months, you remind me of your grandpa every single day.

You see, a few weeks before he died, while you and I were visiting him and grandma, he made you laugh for the first time. Your grandpa started jumping in front of you like a frog and suddenly, you began to giggle so hard that you could barely breathe. It was magical.

But what I remember most about that moment aren’t your delightful squeals, it’s your grandpa’s face. He looked so proud and overjoyed to have provoked those giggles! And now, every time I see you explode into a fit of laughter, I think of that day. I can see him, a wide smile spread across his face and a twinkle in his eye.

It’s a wonderful, happy memory that you helped to create. Thank you.

So Luki, even though your grandpa won’t physically be there on Saturday, I am convinced that his presence will be felt amidst your laughter.

Don’t you ever stop laughing sweet boy.

Love,

Mom